Carnage at health center as PM's bride goes on rampage

In what promises to be the most hilarious story of the week, it emerged today that Merikukka Forsius MP (Green League) threw a toilet roll at a heckler at a Lohja health center late last Saturday. She and her beau Prime Minister Matti Vanhanen (Centre Party) had brought in a friend for treatment at the A&E, which didn't sit well with a middle-aged male customer, who may or may not have been driven mad by the excessive waiting times inherent in socialized health care. Eventually Forsius reached for the toilet roll, which she threw to (at?) the man so he might clean up his language.

Vanhanen and Forsius say that the later the man proposed that they could "make a deal or else..." which prompted the pair to publicly describe the incident from their point of view. According to them, the man accused them of cutting in line, high income, and misuse of position. In an inspired detail, he repeatedly called one the pair a drug addict based on thinness - take a guess which one that was. He also threatened to go fetch his camera and to call the newspapers. Still, the exact trajectory and impact area of the toilet roll are shrouded in mystery as of this moment. According to the man it hit a patient in the head, but he was less than forthright about his role in the incident, so his account probably shouldn't be accepted as accurate without further corroboration.

We all await further developments with bated breath, I'm sure.

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